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Things I’ve Learned After 19 Years of Marriage

My husband, Jerry, and I are celebrating our 19th wedding anniversary today!  I feel like just yesterday, I woke up to a beautiful sunshiny day, our family and friends turned out and we said our ”I do’s” followed by a party to remember!  Nineteen years have gone by so fast and so much has happened, but he’s still the one for me!  I’ve learned a lot about relationships, so I’m sharing today.  I’d love to hear what you have to say as well…please post it in the comments section below!   

I’ll start at what is usually the end:  “… and they lived happily ever after.”  Don’t expect the fairy tale.  It won’t happen.  Nothing is perfect, you have to work at relationships.  Sometimes you have to work through them.  As long as you are BOTH willing to keep trying, you should be fine.

You will have arguments.  You will fight.  You will say things you don’t mean, and so will your significant other.  Remember the stuff that’s worth remembering, and forget the stuff that’s not.  Every fight will either draw you closer together, or push you further apart depending on how you handle it.  Saying a heartfelt “I’m sorry” when it’s over usually goes a long way.

Doing “fix-it” jobs around the house usually leads to arguments.  Every time we hang any kind of wallpaper, we get cranky.  Accept it.  And when you’re done, forget about it.

Talk everyday, about the weather or your kids or anything.  Just look at each other and talk!

Whenever your honey does something nice for you like clean the kitchen or vacuum, simply say “thank you!”  Even if you’re not completely happy with it, say “thank you!”  They will do it again and again, if you show appreciation.  They’ll never do it again, if you don’t.  (Thanks Mom, for that one… it really works!)

The best of times can bring out the worst.  Sometimes, special occasions – whether it’s Christmas or a Birthday Party – can be lots of work and lots of stress.  Really try to be nice to each on these days, and help out.

When the love of your life is in a bad mood, let them be!  We all deserve to be grumpy and miserable sometimes without everyone getting on our case.  A hug works wonders.  A little extra room to complain is always good.  As long as it’s once in a while, let it go!  Hopefully, they’ll give you the same consideration!

Be nice to each other for no reason.  Ladies, don’t expect roses all the time.  Guys, why not bring her home that $3.99 bouquet from Tops?  It really IS the thought that counts.  Little things really DO mean a lot!

Finally, we’ve all seen the signs that say “Always Kiss Me Good Night!”  That’s a must.  No matter what, we kiss good night.  AND, even though he’s asleep when I leave in the morning, I always kiss him good-bye… always!

So, how long have you been married – or in a relationship – and what have you learned?

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